Contest: SQL Server 2022 Needs a Slogan.

SQL Server
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Now that Microsoft has announced that SQL Server 2022 is coming, it’s time for us to talk about a shameful truth:

SQL Server doesn’t sell itself.

Remember when everybody was talking about how MongoDB was Web Scale™? Or when Oracle was Unbreakable™? Even if you were making fun of it, the point was that you were talking about it, and that’s a buzz that SQL Server just doesn’t have.

I believe that you, dear reader, have the answer. I bet that you can come up with a snappy slogan. (The best I could do was “No one out-SQLs the Server,” and let’s be honest, that’s not really good.)

This week, while you’re learning about SQL Server 2022’s cool stuff in all the free training sessions, think about how we can market this thing and sell the heck out of some licenses.

Leave your best slogan in the comments before Saturday morning. Saturday morning, I’ll close the comments down, pick my favorite entries, and publish ’em in a post on Monday. My 3 favorite entries will win a Level 3 Bundle with a Live Class Season Pass, Recorded Class Season Pass, Consultant Toolkit, and SQL ConstantCare.

I’ve got a full cup of coffee here. Make me spit it on my monitor, people.

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