If you don’t get smarter soon, it’s your own damn fault.

Oh sure, I’m running a Black Friday sale, but even if you’re as broke as SSMS’s live query plans, you can still afford this free stuff I’m doing:

Weds-Thurs: Quest Empower 2021 – free conference, and I’ve got a session with Pinal Dave on Wednesday where we’ll cover tips & tricks for SQL Server performance.

Weds-Fri: PASS Data Community Summit – every one of these in the past has been expensive, and this year thanks to Red Gate, it’s totally free. I’m doing the community keynote on Friday, talking about 5 ways the cloud impacts your career. Microsoft has several SQL Server 2022 sessions scheduled already, too – after you’ve registered, open the session catalog and search for 2022.

Nov 16-17: Fundamentals of Columnstore – your report queries are too slow, and regular indexes aren’t enough. You’re on SQL 2016 or newer, and your data’s up over 250GB. Find out if columnstore indexes can help. Find out in this one-day class – I’m doing it on Nov 16th in Europe-friendly times, 8:00-16:00 UTC, and again Nov 17th in Americas-friendly times, 9AM-5PM Eastern.

Nov 23-24: Fundamentals of TempDB – you want to learn how to troubleshoot temp table plan reuse, the version store, latch contention, and where to put the files. Find out in this one-day class – I’m doing it on Nov 23rd in Europe-friendly times, 8:00-16:00 UTC, and again Nov 24th in Americas-friendly times, 9AM-5PM Eastern.

Dec 9: How to Size Storage for SQL Server – In this one-hour session, I will show you how to measure your existing workloads, predict how multiple databases will interact when they’re consolidated, and use all this to gauge what kind of storage you’ll need in your next server.