So, we’re still under lockdown, huh?

I see.

Well, I guess I’ve got no choice but to keep y’all busy. Let’s get together for some free live classes:

May 12 (Tues) Noon Eastern: The New Robots in SQL Server 2017 and 2019 – You’ve been hearing about all these robots that are coming to take your job. They’re going to automate all the SQL performance tuning and make your life way easier, right? Or harder, I guess…since you’ll be looking for a job. Thing is, most of that is just plain old marketing hype that Microsoft is using, trying to sell your management on upgrading to newer versions or moving to the cloud. In this session, Brent Ozar will blow the marketing smoke away, show you these features in action, and show you which ones are ready for prime time. You’ll walk away better equipped to have conversations with management about why you should (or shouldn’t) upgrade, and how you can use these features not just to stay employed, but have a better career. Register here by checking the box for the May 12 session, then put your email address in the box at right, and click Attend Event. If you can’t make it to this live class, the recording link will be sent to the registrants as well.

May 13 (Weds) 2PM Eastern: Dynamic SQL Pro Tips – Dynamic SQL is one of the most powerful tools in the database developer’s arsenal. When you need a complex search stored procedure that takes all kinds of parameters (price, category, location, color), dynamic SQL can run extremely quickly by leveraging better indexes. However, when done wrong, it’s extremely painful to troubleshoot. I’ll teach you how to do it right. Register here, and while you’re at it, check out the full GroupBy lineup – it’s awesome! All kinds of good free stuff.

May 16 (Sat) 9AM Eastern: How to Think Like the SQL Server Engine: All Demo Edition – You’ve heard of my free How to Think Like the Engine class, and maybe you even started watching it, but…it has slides, and you hate slides. Wanna see me do the whole thing in Management Studio, starting with an empty query window and writing the whole thing out from scratch live? This session is for you. I’ll teach all of the concepts without a single slide. You’ll still want to print out this 5-page PDF so you can understand the index pages I’m referring to onscreen – it’ll make a world of difference. This will be a lively session full of questions and jumping-off-topic demos: if you prefer a rigidly structured, not-meandering session, stick with the conventional version of this session. No registration required – just show up here at the class time, but you can also download a calendar file for a reminder. If you can’t make the live class, subscribe to my YouTube channel or my Twitch channel, and the recording will be posted there.

May 18 (Mon) Noon Eastern: Top 3 Pitfalls of Managing Your Cost in Azure SQL DB – You manage servers, not invoices. Your company has started to move their databases into Azure, and they’re asking questions that you’re just not ready to answer. How big does your server need to be when you’re moving an existing database up to the cloud? How are servers measured? How do you measure to know if your new Azure SQL DB is overwhelmed, or if it’s a code or index problem? How do you make the right adjustments once you’re up there? Register here. If you can’t make it to this live class, the recording link will be sent to the registrants as well.

May 30 (Sat) 9AM Eastern: Watch Brent Query PostgreSQL – I’ll write the spring 2020 version of the SQL ConstantCare Population Report, using Azure Data Studio to query Aurora PostgreSQL, and write a blog post in WordPress. The resulting post will drop on Monday, June 1. No registration required – just show up here at the class time, but you can also download a calendar file for a reminder. If you can’t make the live class, subscribe to my YouTube channel or my Twitch channel, and the recording will be posted there.