Category Archives: Writing and Presenting

Writing and Presenting

What Makes a Good Conference Session or Keynote?

One of our FreeCon Chicago brainstorming exercises was to talk about what makes a good training session, conference session, or keynote speech.  I started it by asking a few questions.

And yes, these are the cool kids.

Sign of a bad session: all the cool kids would rather stay out in the hallway.

Does a successful session require a packed room? I was so happy to hear the attendees answer, “No.”  A packed room has absolutely nothing to do with the success of a session: a packed room has to do with the success of the conference schedulers picking the right room size for a given topic, abstract selection committee picking the right abstract for the audience, and speaker’s marketing ability in getting the word out.  You can’t even judge success by the population in the room at the end of the session, either, because many attendees won’t leave mid-session out of sheer politeness.

Does a successful session require demos? The attendees universally answered, “NO!”  The best explanation I’ve seen comes from a post Jeremiah shared in our community newsletter: Why how is boring and how why is awesome by Benjamin Pollack.  No, most audiences don’t really want to watch you click and type and fix typos, but even if they did, conference rooms are horrible, awful places to watch demos.  You can’t see the screen well, you can’t take notes fast enough, and you need a step-by-step reference that you can follow along later anyway.  That’s not to say presentations with demos aren’t successful – indeed, they can be.  It’s just that demos aren’t required to be successful.

Does a successful session require slides? Again, the answer was simple: “NO!”  We talked about some all-demo sessions that were spectacular, Buck Woody’s sessions where all he used was a whiteboard, and panel discussions.  We even liked the Actor’s Studio style where a session is nothing more than a very well-conducted interview.

I have presentations that are on both extremes: my Virtualization & SAN Basics presentation is 100% slides, and my Blitz: SQL Server Takeovers presentation is 100% demos.  Every now and then, a fellow presenter will come up to me afterwards and say (with more than a little disdain), “I noticed that you didn’t use any (slides/demos).  Do attendees ever leave bad feedback about that?”  I totally understand their point of view because presenters are used to certain delivery mechanisms, but instead of the tools, we need to focus on the storytelling.  It’s a tough concept for us technology people to get because our very business is tools.  Instead, we have to take a step back and ask the audience what they’re really here for.  At FreeCon, the answer from the attendees was loud and clear.

A successful session requires one thing: engagement. Attendees have to feel that they’re interacting in some small way.  They want eye contact from the presenter, but much more than that, they want to feel a sense of belonging and bonding with both the presenter and their fellow audience members.  They want a session that engages their brain, shows them something interesting and new, and gives them something to talk about.

Because they serve beer.

My Kind of Keynote

Think about how you engage at the ball game. Whether it’s our kids playing soccer or a visit to a baseball/basketball/football/drinking game, we engage.  We talk back to the announcer on the loudspeaker, we yell at the players, and we share our feelings with the people sitting next to us.  If we’re lucky, we interact directly with the players by catching balls or catching their eye as we sit courtside.  We build up rituals like the seventh inning stretch.

Presentations are spectator sports. We pay for tickets (sometimes), root for the home speaker, share our thoughts on Twitter, and hope to catch a thrown t-shirt.  Engagement gets harder as audiences get bigger, but it’s still possible.  As I walked into my “Tuning T-SQL Step by Step” presentation at Connections Orlando this spring, I realized my session had been moved to the developer track, not the typical SQL Server track.  When the big room filled up, I took a show-of-hands poll to see the mix of developers versus database administrators.  Since it turned out to be a diverse audience, I engaged the audience throughout the presentation by pitting them against each other.  I’d say things like, “Well, you developers know how those DBAs are – they’re control freaks, aren’t they?”  I tried to pick on (and promote) both sides evenly so that everyone in the room would feel like I’d taken their side at least once.

If it’s a blowout or a bad session, we vote with our feet. When I first started going to conferences, I heard the experienced veterans say the same thing over and over: “I’m skipping the morning keynotes – they suck.”  I understood the motivation – many of us partied late into the night – but in my wide-eyed naïveté, I showed up each morning hoping to see the home team knock it out of the park.  Unfortunately, many of the keynotes I’ve attended have just plain sucked.

Which brings me to a question for you: what should we tell new speakers?  What makes a good session or keynote?

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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Dealing with Presentation Criticism

I just had a champagne moment.

Outlier.

Dozens of good feedback forms, and one not-so-good one.

Scott Adams (the creator of Dilbert) blogged about having these champagne moments in his life, times when he was almost-but-not-quite-ready to pop the champagne open because he still wanted to take things higher.  My standards aren’t quite so high – I recognize certain achievements as being champagne-worthy, and this is one of ‘em.

My presentation at SQLSaturday Chicago last weekend was probably one of the best presentation experiences I’ve ever had. To explain it, I need to step backwards through time starting with a pile of feedback forms.  I’ve got a little stack of papers on my desk (pictured at right) from dozens of attendees.  When I review feedback, I break it into two piles: good comments and bad comments. The pile on the left?  All good.  I got one and only one piece of negative feedback:

“Just OK. Only theory. Need to be more in depth and practical session.”

I can live with this because every single part of it is incorrect.  Sounds horrible for me to say, but bear with me and I’ll break it down:

  • “Only theory” – nope, I’ve lived all of these lessons, and there’s nothing in this deck that I haven’t validated via experience.
  • “Need to be more in depth” – I can’t go into more depth when the session is only an hour long. The only way to go into more depth is to reduce the number of topics covered, and the abstract specifically explained the number of topics that would be covered.
  • “Need to be more practical” – I finished up with a checklist of things you need to do when you get back to the office and a set of links to do them. It simply doesn’t get any more practical than that without me visiting your office and doing it for you (and I’ll be happy to do that for a price, but you don’t get that for free at any conference.)

That’s the only single bad comment I got this time, and I’m fine with it.  I consider this my most successful presentation so far, but it’s not because of the stack of good comments.

The Key to Getting Good Comments

Getting positive feedback on your presentations is really simple: get bad comments first, then make your presentations better. My stack of good comments today are the result of me constantly paying attention to yesterday’s bad comments and figuring out what I need to improve.  Here’s a tour of some of the good comments I got this time, and how they came about.

“Great information I can use on Monday morning!  The take home checklist is much appreciated!” – Recently I was going back through my notes from the MCM training and I noticed that I’d made a lot of notes about things I wanted to address with my own servers when I got back to work.  It hit me – I was building a checklist.  Why not finish up every presentation with a list of things the attendee should do when they get back to the office on Monday?  Rather than recapping what I’d told ‘em, I gave them a list of things to do.  This weekend’s presentation was the first one I finished that way, and it was a smash, generating a lot of good feedback.

"He'll be on in just one more minute..."

My Opening Act

“Brent O always gives a fun and informative presentation” – I don’t think you can present successfully with a sense of shame. I’ll wear a Richard Simmons costume to talk about weight stats – I mean wait stats – or I’ll show contortionist photos as I explain good filegroup design. Don’t take yourself seriously. Do you enjoy reading Books Online with all information and zero humor? My attendees sure don’t, and if I don’t keep things lively, they zone out. I keep watching my slides to see if I’ve got enough fun injected into my information. If I don’t have at least one fun slide for every 10-15 informational slides, I get nervous.

“Good presentation and humor and always down to earth.” – For me, being down to earth means that I try to identify with every person who asks a question. There are no stupid questions, because at some point in the past, I asked the exact same question. When I hear a question, I about the point in my career when I wondered the same thing, and I think about what was on my mind at the time. For example, at SQLSaturday Chicago, an attendee asked for clarifications about why we shouldn’t separate clustered indexes and nonclustered indexes onto separate filegroups. I’ve been there myself! I remember reading similar advice on the web, thinking it was a good idea, and applying it to some of my databases. It keeps me humble. Experience doesn’t mean I’m better than anybody else – it just means I’ve made more mistakes.

“Great content available online is good.” – More and more attendees are bringing wireless gadgets with ‘em. They’re bringing iPads with cellular data connections or they’re tethering their phones to their laptops, and they’re surfing the web during the presentation. It’s not enough to tell attendees that the slides and the code will be available sometime next week: they want it right freakin’ now. Before your presentation starts, create a page on your blog with your presentation resources. Put one or two links on there, and upload the PDF version of your slide deck. Give attendees a short, easy-to-remember URL with bit.ly or the WordPress GoCodes plugin. Good comments will ensue.

“Great approach to simplifying complex concepts” – Even though I don’t cook, I like watching the cooking show Good Eats by Alton Brown. He uses crazy props like a life-size cow made of foam to illustrate how science improves cooking.  I don’t leave Good Eats with a degree in science, but I know more than I need to know in order to improve my cooking.  (If I cooked.)  I try to take that same approach with databases by teaching you what you need to know, yet not boring you with the minutiae that doesn’t actually improve your skills.

“More detail than expected which was excellent.” – When someone does want to know more than what’s on the screen, and if I’m running ahead of schedule, I’ll go deep or off-topic in order to satisfy questions.  I have to balance the questions with the clock, so I also have to maintain an encyclopedic knowledge of links with more info.  I use the WordPress GoCodes plugin to save my favorite resources on all kinds of topics.  For example, if someone wants to know more about the file cache problems on Windows, it’s easy for me to remember BrentOzar.com/go/filecache instead of http://blogs.msdn.com/b/ntdebugging/archive/2009/02/06/microsoft-windows-dynamic-cache-service.aspx.  Attendees love it when you can give a 30-90 second answer to a question, plus write a whiteboard link for much more detail about the topic.

“Only complaint is that Brent only had one session.” – On the surface this is an awesome comment, but there’s a dark side.  As a presenter, if you see this as a negative comment and you try to get more sessions, you’re doin’ it wrong.  Relax and enjoy the event as an attendee.  Network with your other presenters, because they’re like your coworkers.  I only had one session this time, so I was able to veg out before my session, help another presenter get feedback, and then start my session relaxed and focused.  That brings me to the next phase of our backwards-in-time journey.

The Keys to the Zen Energy Balance

Brent in his native habitat

Me at SQLSaturday Chicago

As I took questions from leaving attendees, Allen White asked me, “Did you know you started about fifteen minutes early, and you ended about fifteen minutes early?” Yep – perfect timing for length on that one.  I’d started early because there was literally no space left in the room!  With fifteen minutes before go-time, people were standing in the aisles and sitting on the floor.  No sense in waiting around for more folks to come in, because no one else could have crammed in without filing a sexual harassment lawsuit.  Allen himself had taken the presenter’s chair – not that I would ever present sitting down anyway.  I’m one of those running-around-wildly presenters. I’m one espresso short of screaming, “DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS!”

During the presentation, I’d had a good balance of energy and calmness.  I’d relaxed before my presentation by sitting through Erin Stellato‘s good presentation on baselining, and I’d snuck out about fifteen minutes before the end in order to grab coffee. Over the years, I’ve figured out that a shot of adrenaline – err, caffeine – helps get me upbeat, attentive, and focused right before a presentation starts. When the presenter’s zippy, the attendees are zippy. I sat back in her session, drank my zoom juice, and opened up my slide deck.

The moment Erin Stellato finished her presentation and the room’s doors opened, suddenly attendees started flooding in. People had been waiting outside to claim a seat. I hustled up to the podium because I like hooking up my laptop right away to make sure everything works, and when I looked up, the room was chock full of nuts. That’s a fantastic feeling for a presenter, knowing that people really, really wanna see this particular topic. Despite a lack of caffeine and music, I found myself totally energized and pumped up, and that wasn’t anywhere near what I expected.

See, months earlier, when SQLSaturday crew picked this abstract, I was actually disappointed. This wasn’t my favorite presentation. Sure, I was happy with it, but it wasn’t the kind of presentation that really made me proud to be a presenter.  But whaddya know – it ended up being one of my best presenting experiences.

This week, I’m presenting at Connections for the first time, and then it’ll be time to read comments again, and keep sluggin’ through the bad ones.  I look at presenting the same way I look at database administration: being good means you’re never good enough, and you’re constantly trying to find the next way to up your game.  That’s what Scott Adams meant in his champagne moments blog post, and he’s absolutely right.

But I’m still drinking champagne as I write this.  Cheers!

If you liked this post, you might also like some of my past posts about my quests:

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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How to Get Paid to Take a Cruise

As a database expert, I regularly travel to speak at conferences.  When I travel, I try to time my trips to take advantage of other opportunities to see sights, visit friends, or relax.  When my speaking schedule put me in South Florida last summer, I thought I’d take a cruise out of Miami afterwards.

SQLCruise 2010 Classroom

SQLCruise 2010 Classroom

Suddenly I wondered, “What if I offered training on board the cruise ship and got paid for it?”

Since other database people would be in Miami for the same user group event, I thought maybe I could entice them on board for training whenever the ship was at sea.  I’d charge $300 for the training – a relative bargain for 10-14 hours of highly technical training, plus I could have plenty of side conversations about the attendees’ personal challenges with their databases.  I didn’t want to book an entire boat – quite the opposite.  I wanted a small, intimate group of just 15 people max who could hang out, build relationships, and learn cool stuff.

I fired off an email to a close friend of mine, Tim Ford, and we started SQLCruise.com.  We sold out our first cruise, made a profit, and proceeded to start a series of cruises.  If you’ve built a popular blog, this is a great way to monetize your blog by charging for a premium audience experience, and I’d like to share my experiences to help you do it too.

Why People Would Pay Us for Training

For those of you who are new around here, Tim and I both write blogs about Microsoft SQL Server, a popular enterprise database platform.  Over 250,000 people have signed up for the Professional Association for SQL Server, indicating a strong user base, and my blogs target highly technical users.  I write about performance tuning issues, high availability, and disaster recovery.  I’ve spoken at SQL Server events around the world, and my online events often draw over 1,000 live attendees.  At the time we decided to launch the cruise, I had about 3,000 RSS readers and 5,000 Twitter followers.

My online brand revolves around the quality of my writing and presentations.  I’ve won awards and high praise around the world for my sessions, including 2 of the top 10 sessions at the international PASS Summit.  My audience already believes I’m delivering premium SQL presentations and articles, so I didn’t have to do a big marketing push to convince them that I could deliver good content.  They knew I could present, but I had a different challenge: getting them to pay for training aboard a cruise ship.

SQLCruisers ordering drinks on the back deck

SQLCruisers ordering drinks on the back deck

Training on a Cruise Ship? Really?

Cruise costs compare very favorably with typical conference hotels. I usually end up spending $1,300-$1,500 for a week of lodging and food when I attend a conference, but I can get a 4-night cruise for two for under $1,000.  Conference organizers have huge costs for hotel meeting rooms and lunches, which cost way more than you might think.  Much of conference prices come down to the room & food cost.  Cruise lines don’t jack up the room and food prices, though – they’d rather use meetings as bait to get people on board the ship, then take money from them in other ways, like shore excursions, spa packages, and gambling in the casino.

Unfortunately, those last few phrases are also why managers think training aboard a cruise ship might be a joke – nothing more than an excuse to get together and party on the company dime.  Since I wanted my attendees to get their training, travel, and cruise costs paid by their employers, I faced a challenge.  I thought we had to market the cruise in a way that both cruisers and companies would appreciate.

We differentiated ourselves from traditional training conferences in two ways.  First, we offered much longer sessions.  Instead of a blizzard of one-hour sessions, we offered only 3-hour deep dive sessions.  We wanted to spend much more time examining each topic so attendees came away with a solid explanation of the topic rather than a brief introduction.  Second, we emphasized the relationship-building aspect of the cruise as much as the training itself.  We capped attendance at 15 people, and we marketed the cruise as a chance to get to know the presenters in a very casual, all-access environment.  Cruisers had the chance to ask for advice from me and Tim on any topic – their SQL Servers, their job challenges, or their personal brand.

Field trip to the beach

Field trip to the beach

On our first cruise, we sold out all 15 spots a month before the cruise left port, and our cruisers told us they’d signed up for exactly the reasons we’d expected.  They wanted longer sessions, and they wanted to build relationships with us.  Even better, the cruise turned out to be a great way for them to build relationships with each other.  Tim and I watched with joy as the junior SQL Server people talked shop with the more experienced ones, conversed about their challenges, and formed bonds.

Our Second Target Audience: Sponsors

As we built our marketing plan, we realized we had another target audience: sponsors!  We were building an event that would generate a ton of buzz in the community.  Even if SQL Servers couldn’t convince their bosses to pay for training aboard a cruise ship, we knew they’d be watching closely from ashore.  We wanted to be the talk of the town – the kind of event you really wanted to attend, but probably couldn’t.  We offered sponsorship positions to vendors because we hoped our event would be all over Twitter and blogs.  Normally SQL Server vendors would never sponsor paid training classes for just a few attendees – they want to reach more people – but we hoped we had a unique message that would reach even non-attendees.  The buzz about the event might be more valuable than the event itself.

The small size of the event made it an unusual sell for sponsors.  Sponsors want to pay as little as possible in order to reach as many people as possible, but we were pitching a quiet, tight-knit event with a little over a dozen people.  We wanted vendors to send representatives aboard the boat because they’d have the chance to build very close relationships with some of the most influential people in the SQL Server community.  Our attendees were bloggers, presenters, and user group volunteers – people who wouldn’t ordinarily spend hours on end having drinks and relaxing on the beach with vendor employees.  I saw this event as a really unique way to bring these diverse people together.  On the first cruise, no vendor employees attended, but we convinced two to come on the next cruise, and four on the upcoming SQLCruise Alaska.  I’m really excited to see what comes out of the 2011 cruise season.

SQLCruise 2010 docked in Mexico

SQLCruise 2010 docked in Mexico

We sold more sponsorship spots on the first cruise than we’d expected, and we were able to make a very (very) small profit.  We didn’t make anywhere near as much money as we’d normally earn in our day jobs, but for us, the important part was that we were getting paid to have fun on a cruise.  It wasn’t as relaxing as a vacation, though – in fact, it was hard work in the weeks leading up to the cruise.

Handling the Mechanics of Registration

I originally wanted to use EventBrite to handle registrations – it’s a site that lets you sell event tickets using their tools for registration and credit card processing.  I really liked their ability to cap registration at exactly 15 tickets even if I wasn’t around to shut down registration, because I’m on the road and inaccessible a lot.  My worst registration fear was that 20-25 people would register before I got the chance to shut off registration.  However, I couldn’t deal with one showstopper – EventBrite doesn’t release the attendee funds to the event organizer until after the event is over.  I needed the cruisers’ funds to organize travel for me & Tim and to get the swag.  I wasn’t about to go thousands of dollars into the red gambling that I wouldn’t have a problem with EventBrite.

Instead, we handled registration with a WordPress contact form.  As each person registered, we emailed them an invoice with a PayPal link for the registration fee.  We kept track of the attendee details with a Google Docs spreadsheet, and as the event date got closer, we shared the spreadsheet with the cruisers so they could add in their travel details, excursion plans, and share rides to/from the airport.  We used an email list so the cruisers could ask questions, and we found that most of the time, the other cruisers did the answering for us.

SQLCruisers Eating Ashore

SQLCruisers Eating Ashore

Bonding Between the #SQLCruisers

The first round of cruisers shocked us by taking initiative in marketing the event too!  Karen Lopez, one of the cruisers, got the event covered by IT Canada Weekly, and another attendee almost got us on a Seattle TV show.  Our attendees’ willingness to help market our event surprised us so much that we weren’t able to keep up with demand!  We had a full plate just trying to get our presentations ready for the cruise.  Their efforts didn’t stop when they board the ship, either – they wanted to thank the sponsors for making the event possible, so they blogged and generated buzz even while we were at sea.

We think the small number of attendees was a big part of the event’s success.  Long before boarding, the cruisers got to know each other via the mailing list and Twitter, thereby building close bonds.  We know we could sell more spots on our next cruises, but we don’t want to sacrifice what made the event so special.  At the same time, having a large number of watching but non-attending people also helped.  SQLCruise generated great tweets and excitement in the SQL Server community, and that enabled our sponsors to get their moneys’ worth.

Things We Learned Along the Way

The most disappointing lessons all came from the legal side of SQLCruise.  We started the event without requiring sponsor contracts because we’d never used them in our user group transactions with sponsors.  We sent the sponsors a list of sponsorship packages, they picked one, and they sent us payment – case closed.  By the second cruise, though, we realized we had to start getting sponsors to sign on a legally defensible bottom line to protect ourselves from changing whims.

SQLCruise swag bag in Key West

SQLCruise swag bag in Key West

We need to institute a non-refundable deposit due immediately to reserve a spot in the training, too.  We managed to sell out SQLCruise Alaska in just twelve hours, but after the initial sellout, we had one cancellation after another.  As of this writing, we’ve still got 3 spots left.  That sucks as an event organizer because you only get one chance to do a first push to fill up the cruise.  Now I’m faced with mounting another marketing campaign to fill up those last few slots.

We even need to rework our relationships with the cruise lines.  We’ve faced some hurdles getting the comp rooms and meeting rooms that we were promised by the cruise lines, and because our group isn’t huge, we’ve even had our meeting rooms downgraded in order to make room for a bigger group.  (Damn you, weddings.)

Bon Voyage!

I can’t complain because as this blog post goes live, I’m on board the Norwegian Dawn sailing away from Miami along with a dozen cool SQL Server people.  It’s been hard work getting to this point, and it hasn’t been all sunshine and margaritas, but looking back it’s been worth every moment.  I’m really proud of what we’ve built, and I’d love to see more bloggers take on special events like this to help build up communities around their blogs.  There’s absolutely nothing stopping you from organizing your own event – and indeed, there’s people like me who would love to share our knowledge with you.  Maybe your event will be a cruise – or maybe it will be a retreat, a Grand Canyon camping trip, or a wine country tour.  It’s not just about making money – it’s about building close relationships with your readers and your virtual friends.  Just as hundreds of volunteers organize their own user group and SQLSaturday events around the world every year, you can do the same for traincations.  Talk to your close friends, decide where you want to go, build a plan, and open it up to the public.  I’ll drink to your success.

Hmmm, I wonder if the meeting room staff will bring in room service margaritas….

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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The Joys of Tech Editing

I like tech editing because it sharpens my skills.  I think of it as honing my BS detector.  When I read something that surprises me, I’m forced to go dig much deeper into SQL Server to find the real truth.  I can’t just call someone’s work wrong – I have to be able to prove it, and that teaches me things.

I learned something today, too:

The spell checker just shot himself.

When Documents Go Bad

Wow.  High score!

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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InfoBoom: My Experiment in a Different Blogging Voice

Back in November, IBM’s InfoBoom contacted me about writing for them.  Normally I turn down those kinds of requests because I’ve already got a platform for my voice (my blog), and I’m a freak about controlling ownership of my content.  InfoBoom made me an offer I couldn’t refuse, so I stepped back and took another look.

InfoBoom’s slogan is, “Validate, network, and share with a community of respected midsize business leaders and experts just like you.”  That’s very different from how things operate here at BrentOzar.com, and the more I read the content, the more I realized I had to write differently.  I decided to approach it as an experiment: what if I tried to write more like someone who gets paid to write?  What if I was John Dvorak or Robert X. Cringely back before they jumped the shark?  What if I purposely tried to write things to get people engaged?

Over the last two months, I’ve written articles like:

Now it’s time to take a breather and think about what I learned from my experiment.

Writing is hard work. My peak writing hours are 7AM to 10AM, and when I’m in the zone with nothing else going on, I can bang out two good posts.  The problem is that other things are going on – especially these days when I’m doing consulting.  I’m booked 2-3 months in advance right now, and I get new requests from existing clients all the time.  “Can you just remote in and look at this one thing?”  Every day, I have to choose between consulting and blogging, so blogging quite literally costs me money.

I can’t succeed without scheduling blog posts. Since I don’t get as much blogging time as I’d like, I usually schedule my stuff to publish in advance.  I’ve got 2-3 weeks of blog posts scheduled at BrentOzar.com ahead of time, but InfoBoom’s blog platform didn’t have a scheduler.  I ended up writing posts ahead of time in my own WordPress, but saving them as drafts, and then publishing them on InfoBoom manually.  (I have this same issue over at SQLskills, which is why you don’t see me writing as often as I should over there either.)

I enjoy writing in a different voice. Looking at the collection, I’m really proud of what I wrote in the last two months at InfoBoom.  It’s good stuff.  Even though I like it, I wouldn’t have written those same posts here at BrentOzar.com.  Writing for a different site with a different audience encouraged me to take a different look at topics.  Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing bad about these posts that wouldn’t have worked at BrentOzar.com, but if I was writing for this site, I wouldn’t have ended up with those posts.

Other people are crafting their messages too. After writing a couple of InfoBoom posts, I started paying more attention to what other bloggers there were saying, and I started questioning why they wrote what they wrote.  For example, when a tech journalist writes a post titled “The Social Media Hangover is Upon Us,” what’s his real motivation there?  What’s going on behind the scenes that makes him want to write that, and what does he stand to gain by writing it?  Because writing is such hard work, there has to be a gain involved in writing at sites like this, so what is it?  I enjoy that mental exercise – not just reading their work, but parsing their personality.

There’s nothing wrong with using a different voice here. Working with InfoBoom encouraged me to step outside of my usual comfort zone and bring a different kind of post to BrentOzar.com – my Consulting Lines series.  I figured that even though most of you aren’t consultants, you could benefit from hearing me talk like a consultant and kinda coach you into thinking like a consultant.  I got my start on that more than a decade ago working as an internal consultant for a hotel company; they billed my time out to various hotels and departments, so I had to think about providing value for that billed amount.  Ever since then, I’ve focused on providing value to my managers and coworkers.  That sounds so sleazy, and I’ve never wanted to write anything sleazy here, but the reality is that focusing on value really works.  It got me to where I am in my career, and me sharing it can help you too, so I just gotta find a non-sleazy way of doing it.

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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How to Rehearse a Presentation

Buck Woody (Blog@BuckWoody) and I did a presentation at the PASS Summit called, “You’re Not Attractive, But Your Presentations Can Be.”  The audience asked a lot of good questions, and I wanted to recap some of ‘em as blog posts.  The first one – and one of the most frequent questions I get – is, “How often do you really practice presentations before giving them?”

Teleprompters - also invented by Al Gore.

Teleprompters - also invented by Al Gore.

I’m really, really picky about the transitions between slides – and I don’t mean animations.  I love it when people tell me, “Wow, you must have given this a hundred times, because every time you popped the next slide, it was just perfect timing.”  For some reason, that one attribute really screams PROFESSIONAL to me.  Therefore, when I think I’m done writing a presentation, I’ll step through it a few times just talking through my transitions.  I won’t say every word of the content, but I’ll talk through my last point on the slide, hit next, and keep talking – and it has to be out loud.  During that process, I’ll usually find things that don’t work as well as I’d like, or things that are tongue twisters. I’ll rework the slide order to tell the story better, or come up with better pictures to be punch lines.

There’s a drawback to my presentation style: I don’t always leave an opening for the audience to ask questions mid-presentation.  I’m so focused on my slide segues that I don’t pause at the end of a slide and say, “Any questions?” Instead, I try to build in points every few slides where there’s a natural pause.  I’m also learning to build in more pop quizzes to encourage audience interaction.  As I’m going through the presentation, I try to count the number of slides between audience interactions so that it doesn’t become a barrage of Brent.

When I’ve got the transitions done, then I’ll step through the whole thing out loud once and time it.  One of the points Buck and I made was to over-prepare, then cut – build up way more material than you think you need, then cut down to fit the time you’ve got.  If I’m doing a 45-minute presentation, I like to have 60-75 minutes worth of spoken material, and then I choose which sections I can skip entirely, yet still have smooth transitions and deliver the audience everything I promised in the abstract.

Confident that I’ve got good timing and transitions, I’ll hide the clock and give the presentation out loud from start to finish at least twice.  I check the time at the start and end, and that helps me make sure I’m guesstimating the right time for my natural delivery.

Don't even get me started.

Don't even get me started.

After I’ve given it a couple of times and it feels comfortable to me, then I review it for questions.  On each slide, I ask myself, “What questions are going to come up from this slide?  What technology on this slide sounds too good to be true or too tough to bother with?  What common errors will people struggle with, and what objections will they raise?”  For example, when I’m talking about the missing index DMVs, people usually ask about heaps, ask when the DMVs reset, or complain that the DMVs give bad suggestions.  I think about how I’d respond to those questions, and if I need a slide to show an answer, I’ll build it – but leave that slide hidden.  That way, when the question comes up, I can wow ‘em with a slide answer instead of going, “Well, uh, I, uh, never thought about that.”  Picture how your worst enemy would try to pick your presentation apart, and then arm yourself to defend your position.  If you can’t defend what you’re saying, pull it out – you’re not ready to present that point yet.  You will be someday, but just not yet.

If I have to do demos in front of a live audience, I try to have a dedicated virtual machine per presentation.  For example, I’ve got a VM dedicated just to my Blitz presentation.  I know exactly how that server is configured and how it will react.  I get the VM set up for the first time, then shut it down and save a copy of it to a different drive.  Then I start it back up, step through my demos, and make sure they work.  If they don’t, I set it back up again, save another copy of the VM, and try again.  When I’ve got it fully baked and it works perfectly, I save copies of it on two USB hard drives under three names like BLITZ1, BLITZ2, and BLITZ_Original.

It gets worse.  On presentation day, I fire up both BLITZ1 and BLITZ2.  I do my demos on BLITZ1, but if it blows chunks, I switch to BLITZ2.  It’s like database mirroring for your demos.  When my demos are done, I copy BLITZ_Original over BLITZ1 and BLITZ2 so that I’m ready to go next time.  That way, if I did anything to disrupt the status of that VM (like fix one of the purposely-broken databases), I don’t screw up my next Blitz demo.

And when your demo works, you have to say 'Boom.'

And when your demo works, you have to say 'Boom.'

I know I sound black-helicopters-and-aluminum-foil-hat paranoid, but I believe the audience deserves it.  I am just so sick and tired of seeing professionals up on the stage saying, “Hmm, I’m not sure why my demo did that.  Well, here’s what it should have done….”  If you’re going to stand up in front of an audience of a hundred people, think of their time as $100 per hour – so your demo is $10,000 per hour.  Take some basic precautions to ensure that your demo, like Colt 45, works every time.

Finally, I give the presentation in front of people.  I try to never give a presentation for the first time at the regional or national level or on a webcast.  Webcasts are tough because it’s hard to gauge the audience to know whether or not you’re holding their attention and bringing it home.  Regional and national audiences tend to be bigger rooms, and I don’t want to be experimenting in front of more than 50 people.  As I’m giving it, I make mental notes about what felt like it worked, and what needs to be reworked.

When people stop me during the presentation to ask a question that I hadn’t anticipated, I’ll stop right there and write down the question or type it into the PowerPoint slide notes.  If someone cares enough to ask it out loud, there’s probably a few more people in the audience who wanted to ask but were afraid, so I’ll build it into the next version of the presentation.  If nobody asks questions or laughs when I expect them too, I’ll note that, because I gotta keep things engaging.  My goal isn’t to eliminate the questions; my goal is to be able to celebrate them happily and intelligently when they occur.

I often respond to questions by saying, “That’s a good question,” and it’s not because I’m buttering them up for good evaluation surveys.  I believe it’s a good question because I thought of that exact same question during my preparations, and I’m mentally excited because it means two great things have happened.  I’ve engaged them enough to think like I think, and I’ve prepared myself enough to think like they’ll think!  I’m at one with the audience.  It’s my very own moment of Zen.

At the PASS Summit, an audience member asked how Buck and I pulled all these rehearsals off since we live in different cities.  We were lucky enough to get together a couple of times before the Summit to rehearse, and we focused on the transitions.  When you’re co-presenting in front of big audiences, it’s so important to know how the handoffs will work.  With smaller audiences, I don’t mind winging it when I’m co-presenting with someone I know well.  I’ve co-presented in front of 15-20 people with Tim Ford and Tom LaRock on various occasions, and because we know each other’s backgrounds, it’s easy for us to pause mid-slide and hand things over with a question.  If you have to co-present with minimal planning, think basketball: don’t hog the ball.  Pass back and forth as frequently as you can.  The audience appreciates the banter and chemistry.

If you get the chance to be a guest on a podcast or interview, listen to a couple of past episodes to learn the rhythm and host personalities.  For example, when I’m on Virtumania, I know I can play things fast and loose with the innuendos, but on a SQL Server Magazine interview I have to keep things a little more straight-laced.  You get massive bonus points with the host if you know some of the in-jokes they use, like running gags or sound effects on the show.  Give them ample opportunities to interact with you – stop, take a breath, and ask questions like, “Have you had any experiences like that?”  Remember that you’re a guest, not a host, but by all means, speak up.  I keep a stopwatch up on the screen so that I can see seconds moving, and when I start talking, I make a mental note of the time.  If I’ve gone on for more than 45-60 seconds, it’s time to shut up and let ‘em get a word in edgewise.

Huge Blogger Panel Discussion

Huge Blogger Panel Discussion

If you’re invited to a panel discussion or roundtable – a presentation where several speakers share the stage – that stopwatch advice is especially relevant.  Before the event starts, I jot down a few talking points on a Post-It note or a napkin, whatever’s handy, so that I can jump start discussions if things get quiet.  On the other hand, I also do some quick math: I take the length of the session, divide it by the number of speakers (including the moderator), and that’s my share.  If there’s an hour-long session with four speakers and a moderator, that means I get about 12 minutes.  It’s my duty to help the moderator by livening up the room with 12 minutes of fun banter, and it’s my responsibility to the other presenters to make sure they get their 12 minutes.

Reading back through this, I realize I’m probably making it sound more intimidating than it is.  I certainly didn’t start out rehearsing my presentations this thoroughly!  The only reason I approach it this way today is that I’ve come to realize my presentations are a valuable library.  When I’m working with a client, I love being able to say, “Here’s the issue you’re having, and I’ve got a presentation that talks about how to solve it.  Let’s get the staff together for an hour and we’ll cover this presentation with specifics about your environment.”  My clients love this highly personalized training, and they see real value in it.

Yes, companies will actually pay you to give your presentations to their staff – even the very same presentations that might be available for free on the web.  The value is having the right presenter give the right presentation at the right time.  There’s an overwhelming amount of free material online, and nobody’s got the time to peruse it all.

Your presentations are worth the effort.  Your audience and your clients will love you for it!

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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My 2010 Blog in Review

Time to take a look back at what happened in 2010.  Turns out I was pretty busy – here’s my favorite posts:

January:

February:

March:

April:

May:

June:

  • I Joined SQLskills – I truly loved what I was doing at Quest Software, and I thought life couldn’t get any better, but as it turns out, it could.
  • Four People Won Free SQLCruises – this just blew me away.  Between the new job and the first SQLCruise, I was tied up for a while, so blogging subsided.

July:

August:

  • GTD: Why Things Have Been Quiet Around Here – when I decided to make the big switch into consulting full time, I was terrified that I’d be eating ramen noodles for the first six months.  As a result, I took every possible gig that came my way, including more travel than I would have preferred.  When I finally figured out I wasn’t going to starve to death, things got a lot better, and my work/life balance returned.
  • Jeremiah Peschka Joined Quest – and a bunch of other people started getting paid for community work in 2010 including Tom LaRock, Aaron Bertrand, Colin Stasiuk, and another player who is yet to be named.
  • Why I’m Disappointed in the PASS Election Process

September:

October:

November:

December:

In addition to the blogging, I snuck in some travel photos:

Whoa.  Looking back at this list, I’m surprised I wrote so many posts that I’m actually proud of, and the second half of the year was especially challenging.  I’m no longer paid directly to blog – as a consultant, I only get paid when I’m billing clients.  I’m blogging now because I really love doing it, and because it helps bring in new clients.  I’m tickled pink every time I get an email saying, “I liked your blog post about ___, and we were wondering if you could help us out with this problem we’re having.”

Blogging: win friends and influence customers.  Remind me again why you’re not doing it?  Oh, that’s right, you’re so busy working for that company you don’t even really like and who didn’t give you a raise again this year.  When you get tired of that, read my favorite post from this year – Rock Stars, Normal People, and You.  There’s a whole community of people who want to see you succeed, and we want to help.  Come join the community in 2011!

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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SQLskills MCM Videos: Behind the Scenes

A few weeks ago, Microsoft unveiled changes to the Microsoft Certified Master (MCM) of SQL Server program and showed off new free video training materials by SQLskills.  I was curious to hear what the community would think about the new certification and our training materials.

Jason Strate (Blog@StrateSQL) was the first to blog about trying to pass the MCM.  There’s two parts to the MCM test now: a written multiple-choice exam, and after passing that, a six-hour hands-on lab exam.  Jason didn’t pass the written exam the first time, and I applaud his honesty in blogging about that.  It’s valuable for readers because you need to look at Jason’s credentials before making a run at the exam yourself.  I usually recommend that senior DBAs just “Iron Man” the MCITP exams – take the exams without studying, then decide what areas of your knowledge need some improvement.  I don’t recommend that at all for the MCM exam; spend some time – or a lot of time – going through the training material first.

The easiest way to get started is by watching the free training videos we recorded.  I shamelessly copied (plagiarized?) Paul’s opening line of his videos: “(These videos) are not a replacement for the experience you’ll need, but they will show you the breadth of material you’ll need to know, and the depth to which you should know it.”  Candidates can watch all 40 hours of training videos and still not be ready for the exam.

For example, my SQLOS video is 30 minutes long.  I just can’t teach SQLOS concepts in 30 minutes – Gert Draper’s SQLOS talk consumed 4 hours when I was at the MCM – so I had to pick specific areas to cover.  Rather than trying to do justice to CPU scheduling, memory management, and SQLOS’s services, I focused just on CPU scheduling. If you watch the video, you’ll see how deep you need to go on CPU scheduling, and you’ll see the other parts of SQLOS that you need to research on your own.

Recording those free training videos proved way more challenging than I’d expected.  How much could I assume that the audience already knows?  If I only had 30 minutes to cover a particular topic, I didn’t want to waste time on something most senior DBAs already knew.  The MCITP DBA and MCITP Database Developer are prerequisites for the Microsoft Certified Master program, so I assumed anything MCITP-testable was too basic.  However, the MCM requires knowledge of things outside of the MCITP, like virtualization.  How much should I assume that the viewer already knows about virtualization?  Should I define the terms “guest” and “host” or just skip right past that?  I found myself thinking about my SQLcruise attendees.  I thought, “Would Dave Levy know this?  Would Crys Manson know it?  Is this something Yanni Robel has talked about?”

After the first round of videos went live, I gritted my teeth and braced for the feedback.

Nothing came.

The silence reminded me of what happened when we published our book.  I had expected a furious roar of people pointing at various lines in the book, yelling, “THIS IS BOGUS!  THIS IS ALL WRONG!”  Only one or two bug reports trickled in over time, and in the quiet, I wasn’t sure if people were getting any value out of the book, or if maybe, just maybe, we got everything right.  In the year since we published the book, I’ve gradually heard good things from readers, so I know it worked out well.

We slowly started getting feedback.  Andre Kamman sent me an email questioning something I’d said in the Baselining & Benchmarking video.  I’d said Page Life Expectancy can drop during backups.  I’ve seen that happen time and again during my career, and it’s why I discard memory statistics from times when backups are running.  Unfortunately for me, Andre is one smart fella (and a gentleman, one of the many great people I love seeing at SQLbits) and he also included a link to a Paul Randal blog post saying PLE isn’t affected by backups.  Uh oh!  So now I have to do some rigorous testing to prove that out – I’ve got a hunch that it’s caused by the third party backup software I use, which consumes memory during backups, and might be putting SQL Server under memory pressure.  It shouldn’t, but…

From that point on, as I recorded MCM videos, I kept rerecording the same slides trying to make sure I didn’t misstate anything.  My regular speaking style is very fast, loose, and animated.  I jump into impromptu soliloquies on a topic, thinking of new ways to explain stale topics, and this carries a huge risk with recorded videos – especially those with a big audience.  The PLE quote was a great example, because I spoke off the cuff trying to explain reasons why PLE usually drops.

Turns out that even just mentioning Page Life Expectancy and possible thresholds for it is fraught with peril.  Someone posted a completely misleading blog entry about why PLE should be exactly 300 – which is wildly incorrect – and that led Paul to imply that there’s no such thing as a threshold for PLE.  I agree that there’s no black-and-white good/bad number, but the lower PLE gets, the more turnover you’re experiencing in memory.  That doesn’t necessarily mean your server needs more memory, and in fact, buying more memory may not be the best way to improve performance.  The classic example is a query doing huge table scans because someone added an additional field to a commonly used report, and the query no longer uses just a covering index.  Adding the new field to the index (or removing the field from the report, ha ha ho ho) might improve performance more than adding memory.

At the MCM level, there’s even religious wars about which terms to use.  The term active/active clustering refers to a SQL Server cluster where multiple nodes are running active instances of SQL Server on each node – but so does the term multi-instance clustering. The term multi-instance is more technically correct, but it’s not a commonly used term – the market standardized on active/active clustering a long, long time ago.  I used the more common wording in my clustering video, but I took pains to explain why that term (as well as the term shared-nothing clustering) is misleading.  Geoff Hiten, a clustering MVP that I very highly respect, took me to task for using the misleading term.  He’s totally right in that multi-instance is better, but that wasn’t an objective I wanted to pursue in the MCM videos.

You know the drill with SQL Server answers – it depends.  As much as we try to clarify points in the videos, there’s always going to be contentious points that people will debate.  To help facilitate that, Microsoft is putting together a forum where viewers can discuss questions and MCMs can offer guidance.  In the meantime, feel free to email the presenter of each video directly with your questions.  Please email us, rather than tweeting, because the 140-character Twitter limit doesn’t do justice to questions or answers.  If you’d like to crowd-source your question before the forum goes up, feel free to post programming questions on StackOverflow and admin questions on ServerFault.  That way, you can elaborate in detail on your question, and we can get lots of brains involved.  You can then tweet a link to your question with the #SQLhelp hash tag to get the Twitterati’s attention.

Finally, I’d like to give you one more point of contact.  Joe Sack (@JosephSack) leads the SQL MCM program.  He’s put in endless hours to help craft the entire experience.  He listens patiently to feedback, takes action, and believes in doing the right thing for everybody involved.  He’s been the driving force between getting the tests right, getting the testing facilities to obey the rules, and what might even be my favorite thing of all, getting freely available MP4 versions of these videos available for download from Microsoft.  No matter what kind of device you use, there’s free SQL Server training videos available for you right now.

Happy learning, and good luck with your exams!  If you pass the written test (and even better, the lab), please let me know – I’d like to congratulate you personally and interview you.  I know the rest of my readers would love to hear your MCM story.

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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Resolving to Present More in 2011?

If your New Year’s Resolution in 2011 is to get more active in the SQL Server community, you have to get started now.  SQLSaturdays are an easy way to dip your toe in the water because they’re free multi-track events held pretty frequently all over the US.  You can submit sessions online right now for several upcoming SQLSaturdays including:

The View From The Top

The View From The Top

You can submit abstracts right now from the comfort of your cubicle.  There’s no background check, no fees, no scary interview process, just a one-page form to fill out under the “Speakers” link for each SQLSaturday, and that’s it.

Quit putting it off.  Presenting is the fastest way to upgrade your career and your skills.  Yes, writing an abstract is terrifying, and things only get worse when your abstract is actually accepted, because then you have to write the presentation!  Stop surfing and start submitting.

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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Un-SQL Friday: Branding – Tough Love Edition

Jen McCown (the wife part of the husband-and-wife MidnightDBA team) declared yesterday to be the first Un-SQL Friday – a day where bloggers talk about anything other than SQL Server.  The topic of the day was branding, and Jen’s post declared me a branding superstar.  (Awk-ward.)

I couldn’t participate right away because I already had a post scheduled for Friday, and I try not to overwhelm you guys with blog posts.  I read the responses unfold, and I’m not going to name names, but I saw a heck of a lot of really, really bad advice – and nobody referenced a book.

Hello, people.  Here comes the tough love.

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.  In the land of SQL Server, the guy who’s only read a couple of books about it is considered a “branding superstar.”  I’ll be the first to tell you that I suck at branding and marketing, and I’ll tell you that because when it comes to marketing, I don’t consider my competitors to be the SQL Server community.  I consider my competitors to be the marketing community, because my real competitors are big consulting companies that can afford to hire full-time marketing departments.

Breakfast of Champion Consultants

Breakfast of Champion Consultants

When I quit my job in July and joined SQLskills, I stopped getting a paycheck.  Period.  I’m a consulting partner – I have to find clients, do work, and get the clients to pay us.  I thought for sure that I’d be eating ramen noodles for six months while I got my pipeline together, but a funny thing happened on the way to the microwave.  I got email after email that all started with the same few words: “I loved your blog/presentation/webcast on ___, and I was wondering if you could help us with…”

That’s the kind of customer that consulting companies love.  The customer already knows who I am, they know what I do, and they choose to work with me.  No cold calls, no taking the executives out to the golf course, no expensive dinners at steak houses – just instant relationships.  I can only do this because I’ve built a brand over the last few years that companies know they can trust, and that they want to work with by choice.  I could only do that because I learned from people who really understood branding and marketing, because I sure as heck don’t.

There are millions of people out there who do marketing for a living.  There are thousands of people who are amazing marketers, and there are dozens of books about it at your local bookstore.  Stop learning by trial and error and error and error – go pick up one of these books:

You wouldn’t take your car to the dry cleaners to find out what that rattling noise is.  You wouldn’t go to your favorite restaurant to ask how to implement accounting software.  Likewise, don’t take branding advice from people who don’t make a successful living doing branding.  ‘Nuff said.

Brent Ozar

Brent specializes in performance tuning for SQL Server, VMware, and storage. He's one of the very few Microsoft Certified Masters of SQL Server, a published author, and a Microsoft MVP. He likes travel, Jeeps, Apple gear, jokes, and writing about himself in the third person. Read more and contact Brent.

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