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Month: October 2008

Somebody created a Halloween monster #SQLputdowns

Last Updated June 14, 2019

I think Tim Ford aka SQLAgentMan was the first with this, but now it’s turned into a monster. On Twitter, we’re trading SQL putdowns. You can find ’em on search.twitter.com by searching for #SQLputdowns. Here were my personal favorites from the chatter: Yo mama so dumb she separates statements with STOP. – JCumberland Yo mamma…

Watch a free 10-minute preview of SSWUG videos (update with discount)

Last Updated October 29, 2008

You’ve heard me talk about my SSWUG video conference sessions, but you’re not sure whether it’ll work, or whether it’s worth the money? Well, Chris Shaw and the good folks at SSWUG are giving away free previews to show you how good it looks. You can watch the first ten minute of my SQLIO session…

Before you upgrade to SQL Server 2008…

Last Updated January 10, 2009

This month’s Redmond Mag glows about some new features in SQL 2008, and yes, it does have a lot of cool tricks up its sleeve. But before you go upgrading your servers to get those new features, there’s one thing you need to know. New versions of SQL Server are not always faster for every…

Office in the web + BI in Excel != SSAS DBA jobs

Last Updated October 28, 2008

Add these two things together: SQL Server’s Project Gemini is moving BI into Excel. The next version of Office will be available inside the browser. If that doesn’t scream hosted-BI, I don’t know what does. This is more fuel for Jason Massie’s belief that cloud services will kill the DBA, and I gotta tell you,…

Want to stop Windows from locking your screen?

Last Updated October 28, 2008

I work for a company whose IT department has a group policy enforced so that our screens lock after 10 minutes of inactivity. That’s great in theory, but I run my corporate workstation inside VMware, which means I’m back and forth between different windows all the time. When I go away from my Windows VM…

Getting Started with Amazon EC2 SQL Server 2005

Last Updated February 13, 2017

Amazon Web Services (AWS)

Sometimes you need an offsite database server in case something goes wrong, but you can’t afford a full-blown disaster recovery datacenter. Or maybe you’ve got some ideas that you’d like to try out with a big SQL Server 2005 box, but you don’t have the hardware sitting around idle. Or maybe you’d just like to…

SQL 2008 upgrade & tuning for StackOverflow.com

Last Updated February 9, 2017

I’ve mentioned Jeff Atwood of CodingHorror.com a few times over the years here, and it bears repeating: he writes a great blog for developers, and DBAs need to read it too. I also follow him on Twitter, and a couple of weeks ago he mentioned he was having problems deciphering execution plans: Holy cow –…

Welcome to the Social…Hell! (My Zune experience)

Last Updated August 24, 2009

I bought a Microsoft Zune 8 to test the new SQLServerPedia video podcasts and the user experience was so unpolished, so unprofessional that I just had to bang out a blog about it. Looking at the iPod Nano next to the Zune 8, I could never understand why somebody would buy the Zune 8. Now…

SQL Server 2008 Management Studio: Group Execute

Last Updated January 10, 2009

I’m going to show how to use a new feature in SQL Server 2008 Management Studio: the ability to query groups of servers simultaneously. In Registered Servers, right-click on a group of servers and click New Query. What comes up will look like a normal query window, but pay close attention to the very bottom…

Amazon EC2 Windows support now live!

Last Updated February 13, 2017

Amazon Web Services (AWS)

You can now spin up a virtual server in Amazon’s datacenter with Windows running. Even better, you can spin up a fresh new SQL Server for around $1 per hour. Amazon Web Services Blog announcement on Windows support Amazon EC2 description with Windows and SQL Server pricing And of course, this comes on a day…

Being the Porsche of job candidates

Last Updated August 3, 2018

Professional Development

Stephen Wynkoop blogged about social networking as a part of the hiring process. I’ll sum it up in a line: like it or not, you are being Googled when you submit your resume. Get over it. Would you buy a car without searching for an online review? Sure, some people do – otherwise the dismal…

The problem with SQL Server training today

Last Updated October 20, 2008

I haven’t been doing a lot of in-depth technical blogging here lately because I’ve been working on a very big problem: the state of SQL Server training today. DBA training today has all kinds of problems: I’d go buy a book, but books take forever to come out. I’d like to learn about SQL Server…

Houston Twitter party at Coffee Groundz on Nov 2

Last Updated October 20, 2008

Want to meet your mostest favoritest Houston tweeps and talk trash about your leastest favoritest ones? Coffee Groundz in Midtown is hosting a Twitter party on Sunday, November 2nd from 2pm to 6pm. Those of you who follow me on Twitter or on BrightKite know that I’m here all the time – I’m typing this…

SSWUG Virtual Conference discount code

Last Updated October 17, 2008

Psst – want $25 off the SSWUG Virtual Conference, bringing it down to only $75? I got a promo email today from my employer (see, when it comes from the people who pay your check, you can’t call it “spam”) that says to enter VIPVC2510 in the VIP code field. For all I know, this…

Moving to Michigan temporarily

Last Updated October 16, 2008

One of the sweet things about telecommuting is the ability to pack up the tents and head off to a new location for a while. Erika’s never seen a real winter, so we’re moving up to my hometown of Whitehall, Michigan. We’re staying in the Colby State Park – not a real state park, of…

IBM SVC Entry Edition pricing out

Last Updated February 13, 2017

IBM just unveiled a smaller-scale edition of their storage virtualization solution called IBM System Storage SVC Entry Edition. From the interwebs comes a press release which includes this juicy quote: “The idea is to make it more affordable for smaller companies – the entry edition is priced per disk drive with a starting configuration costing…

PASS 2008 Summit Meetups

Last Updated February 9, 2017

If you’re going to the Professional Association for SQL Server summit in Seattle, let’s meet up! Here’s my travel info: Flight in: Houston to Seattle, Continental 1767 – arrives Sunday, 11:41 AM Hotel: Sunday to Tuesday night, Hotel 1000. Rest of week, Sheraton. Flight out: Seattle to Houston, Continental 223 – leaves Saturday, 6:10 AM…

Short IT Stories for Halloween (#ITBoo)

Last Updated October 14, 2008

I had a burst of creativity and suggested to my Twitter peeps that they write short IT horror stories, 140 characters or less, and identify them with #ITBoo. You can find ’em here on Search.Twitter.com by searching for #ITBoo.

A little ninja work before breakfast

Last Updated February 9, 2017

Mornings like this, I can’t believe I get paid to do this stuff: That’s Jeff Atwood of Coding Horror and Stack Overflow, whose blog I’ve been reading for years. I actually bought a t-shirt with his site’s logo way back in 2006. Jeff effing Atwood. If I saw him, I’d ask for his autograph on…

What I learned at Tulsa Tech Fest 2008

Last Updated March 27, 2009

Tulsa Tech Fest is a ginormous cross-discipline tech event that drew over 800 people to two days of fun sessions at OSU-Tulsa. I learned so much from so many different people that I can’t even begin to lay it all out, but I’m going to throw in the highlights here. Tulsa developers “get” social media.…