Last Day Shenanigans

SQL Server
15 Comments

To follow up on my NY Times Best Selling blog post

On First Day Deal Breakers, here’s something you can do on your last day, as a friendly reminder that everyone is losing a valued team member.

Change the color of everyone’s error messages.

Dammit.
Dammit.

“Change the font too.” –Brent

Monstrous.
Monstrous.

Probably the meanest part

Is that you have to restart SSMS to change this. So you’ll be long gone before it starts happening. Well, maybe! SSMS is quite accident prone.

Devious!
Devious!
Mischievous!
Mischievous!

On the plus side

This blog post has a really high Flesch Reading Ease score. Over 91.

Thanks for reading!

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15 Comments. Leave new

  • That is *evil* and I like it!

    But, if everyone has SSMS on their local workstation, it’s only going to be effective if they’re RDP’ing to a shared box (and doesn’t SSMS save a separate config for each user?)

    Reply
    • Easily solved using some combination of Group Policy and HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Microsoft SQL Server\100\Tools\Shell

      Reply
  • This is so evil that I love it. The best thing to do is to do it on the physical box or VM of the SQL Server instance. Since in most companies people usually log into boxes as Admin or some other generic super user account, it’ll take them a while to figure this out.

    Reply
  • I suppose you could have fun by discretely setting up PBM and utilising it’s Change Prevent functionality …. not many people would know why their configuration changes are being rolled back … and I don’t think knowledge of this feature is common…. Not that I would condone that sort of behaviour

    Reply
  • If you don’t make errors, this won’t affect you, right? Just thinking what our devs would say.

    Also, my comment comes in at a 3rd grade level on the F-K scale. “Very childish” but satisfying.

    Reply
  • I always like to change the batch terminator to SELECT instead of GO 🙂

    Reply
  • Flesch Reading Ease: Over 9000!

    When using Registered Servers, change the connection custom colours to “Calm” Green for Production servers and “OMG” Red for the DEV/UAT servers! Mu ha harr…

    Reply
  • Or, for security purposes, of course, set a new SA account password (or any other shared password). To something that’s at least 256 bits in length. And is random. And is stored safely in a KeePass at least 6 folders deep on some IT-only share that no one will remember how to get to. Because you know no one has changed that password for a decade and everyone has it memorized.

    Reply
  • And remember to change your alerts settings on SQL Server to point to your GMAIL account, so you’ll still get all those error notices… and then you can laugh because no one there knows how to fix those errors and you can see how long it takes them to get a new DBA who’s competent.

    Reply
  • For some more last-day-fun have a look at Rob Volk’s “Revenge: The SQL!”

    https://sqlbits.com/Sessions/Event12/Revenge_The_SQL

    Reply
  • Some of this is funny, but for the most part not a good idea at all. Changing passwords or locking systems down so others cannot get in is not cool. Any of the other harmless pranks are simply unprofessional. If someone doesn’t want me to work for them or if I decide to move on, I do just that. I log out and assume my account is deleted or disabled and that is it.

    Reply
    • i’m inclined to agree….this is friendly fire.

      however, a post with pranks to play on one’s erstwhile *NoSQL* brethren…now that i’d like to see. =P

      Reply

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