Announcing the SQL Server Theme Song Winners

Humor, SQL Server

We asked you to pick theme songs to play when SQL Server has issues, and holy cow, you sent in a ton of submissions. We couldn’t possibly pick just one in each category, so each of us picked our own winners – all of whom get a free training video class of their choice. (Folks who won in multiple categories really cleaned up – they got a free Everything Bundle to recognize their spectacular achievement.)

Best Song to Play During a Server Outage

Best Song to Illustrate Your Predecessor’s Skills

Best Song to Accompany an Index Rebuild

Best Song to Play When Examining a Slow Query

Best Song to Play When Corruption is Found

Best Song for a SQL Server with 4GB RAM

Best Song to Play While a Cursor Runs

Best Song to Prepare for a SQL Server Service Pack

Best Overall Match Winner

The best song match has to be playing Meat Loaf’s Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad when corruption is found. For finding this incredible match, James Chorlton wins himself an Everything Bundle. Check out these lyrics:

Baby we can talk all night
But that ain’t getting us nowhere
I told you everything I possibly can
There’s nothing left inside of here

And maybe you can cry all night
But that’ll never change the way I feel
The snow is really piling up outside
I wish you wouldn’t make me leave here

I poured it on and I poured it out
I tried to show you just how much I care
I’m tired of words and I’m too hoarse to shout
But you’ve been cold to me so long
I’m crying icicles instead of tears

And all I can do is keep on telling you
I want you
I need you
But there ain’t no way
I’m ever gonna love you
Now don’t be sad
‘Cause two out of three ain’t bad
Now don’t be sad
‘Cause two out of three ain’t bad

You’ll never find your gold on a sandy beach
You’ll never drill for oil on a city street
I know you’re looking for a ruby
In a mountain of rocks
But there ain’t no Coupe de Ville hiding
At the bottom of a Cracker Jack box

I can’t lie
I can’t tell you that I’m something I’m not
No matter how I try
I’ll never be able to give you something
Something that I just haven’t got

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